Image Map

5/26/10

Art as Ethos

i want to decorate because a few months ago i started reading home decor blogs and now i have an inferiority complex about my house. if your house is a reflection of your personality, mine screams:

BORING.

since committing to a particular decorating scheme freaks me out, i decided i should just buy art. it is portable. you can make it work with almost any colour scheme. of course the problem with this is that my taste in art outstrips my budget for art by about 100%.

so i have been looking for posters from sites like etsy and allposters. today i looked at like 100 different versions of the "keep calm and carry on" poster (which incidentally has an interesting history).


i like it, but i can't make myself buy it. for whatever reason i have this idea that art should be a representation of who you are. people who know me know that "keeping calm" and "carrying on" doesn't exactly sum up my approach to coping. a more appropriate poster would read:

freak out and cry about it.

so anyway, long story short, this one is out.

but i like these two:



so friends if you know of anything beautiful, lovely or of good report (or cheeky) (and cheap) please send me your links. help me at least keep up the appearance of having a personality.

please? por favor? s'il vous plait?

5/25/10

MY Tunes

When I was in high school I was obsessed with Bob Dylan. My after school ritual went something like this: get a snack, go to room, lay on bed, stare up at neon stars on ceiling (a misguided decorating choice), and listen “Tambourine Man” on repeat.

I did this for years. I did it until my younger brother had enough and decided it was time for my Bob Dylan tape to have a tragic encounter with the toilet.

One might think now that I am grown up, I’d have weaned myself from rituals like listening to songs on repeat. But one would be wrong. There are some new developments, however. For example Michael has replaced my brother in the role of "annoyed family member." Also, Bob Dylan’s hippy folk music has been replaced with music of the trashy euro club genre, specifically “Bulletproof” by La Roux

(And speaking of roux isn’t that some kind of flour and butter concoction??? Gross.)

(Opps and according to Wikipedia la roux is English electropop. My bad.)

According to itunes I have listened to this song 73 times (in 48 hours). This is a problem. If I keep this pace up I risk coming down with “bulletproof brain” (as in the worst case of writers block imaginable). This is problematic when you make your living as a writer!

So question: tell me what song should replace bulletproof?

And seriously if you aren’t already working out to this song, go download it and thank me for fact that you run 20% faster when you listen to it later.

5/7/10

I can't quit you:

spray butter
perezhilton.com
gossip girl
sugar free candy
complaining about living in utah
nail biting




and just in case you aren' totaly gross out by me already, i am just going to go ahead and admit that i buy frozen hamburgers from costco, and i like them....

5/5/10

recent statistics*

places traveled:
  1. Calgary for some family time.
  2. Phoenix for some hot yoga.
  3. Las Vegas for all things that stay in Vegas.
  4. Los Angeles for a wedding.
  5. Boston to remind me of how much i miss the east cost.
  6. Rhode Island to remind me that there are places where the people are bigger hicks than in Utah.

books read:
the trouble with physics

(the trouble with this book is it is BOOORING.)

a fine balance
(the indian version of anna karenina and a must read. MUST MUST MUST.)

the man who ate everything
(by jeffery steingarten of iron chef fame. god put jeffery steingarten on earth to make fun of' stupid food phobias. even though i am faily certain he would make a lot of fun of me, i still love him and his book.)

teach like a champion
(bought because my primary class is going to drive me to drink. the book is supposed to help with classroom management. the only thing it is helping with, however, is my resolve not to have children.)

sense and sensibility.
(favorite line: like him? esteem him? use those insipid words again and i will leave the room this instant.)

TV series watched
deadwood.
a dead-good western. don't watch if you are offended by colourful language.

the wire.

makes you wonder why you ever wasted time on law and order reruns. also don't watch if offended by colourful language.

the good wife.

based on the elliot spitzer/rod blagojevich scandal. i real gem of a show.

keeping up with the kardashians.
it is free on on demand. i blame on demand or a lot of poor tv habits.

Jobs Quit:
bridal store employee

Jobs Gained:
Ghostwriter (seriously).

*i mention all these things for a couple of reasons. first, i like lists. second, lists make me feel like i am doing something with all my time; the illusion of productivity if you will.

3/10/10

i never learn, or maybe i do...

summer 2005: me, on the bathroom floor, writhing in pain after consuming a large sugar free crystal light slurpee. that night i vowed i'd never partake food of the sugar-free variety again.

famous last words....

last night: me, in the bathroom, trying to coax my body into releasing the toxic gases it produced as a result of consuming too many sugar-free candies. effort to no avail. i still feel positively raunchy today.

i'd like to say this time i've learned my lesson and i will never do this to myself again....

but i'm starting to think i'm a glutton for punishment.

3/9/10

Alberta Politics

someone i know told me they are interested in the wildrose party. at the time they mentioned this new alberta based political party, i thought perhaps i should look into it. alas eating weight watchers chocolate toffee candies (only one point) and reading gofugyourself.com has kept me pretty busy for the last, oh, month or so.

so then the other night when i was in the tub listening to a cbc podcast and they announced they were going to be interviewing the leader of the wildrose party, i was like:"oh goody." ok actually, i remember thinking: "i am totally not in the mood for this." but then getting out of the tub means risking hypotherima and at the time death didn't sound that appealing. so there i was, a captive audience.

i'm not going to lie, i was less than impressed.

ms. smith spent the entire time talking about: how climate change is, in fact, not true; how we should not let american policy on carbon affect how we do business in alberta (because america is not the center of the universe); and how evidence that does not support climate change is suppressed by scientific journals in a conspiracy to support al gore (slightly overstated on my part).

wow. honestly you have ten minutes to talk to a NATIONAL audience about what your party stands for and you choose to talk about how climate change isn't real? no wonder the rest of canada thinks people from alberta are nut jobs. if i didn't know better i would say ms. smith is also the "genius" behind the sign that was once prominently displayed on the #2 highway going north from calgary; the one that said, "alberta separation, isn't it about time."

but i digress....

ms. smith may not like to admit it, but alberta oil companies are and will be greatly affected by american policies on the environment. the united states may not be the center of the universe, but they are a huge customer. a carbon tax there would devastate the economy here.

so what i want to know is where does denying climate change get us? how does it promote the interests of alberta oil companies to their international customers? if a country is concerned about the environment and is considering a carbon tax, we aren't going to get anywhere trying to convince them that climate change doesn't exist. that ship has sailed.

what we need is to lobby our client's governments (and our own) to ensure that SMART environmental policies are implemented. we need to invest time and money into making sophisticated economic arguments about the cost effectiveness of policies designed to reduce those carbon footprints. when people learn that a carbon tax, for example, comes at a huge economic expense so that 100 years from now it will not be 1 degree warmer, people are going to stop and think. people are not going to even consider your ideas if you start by making the politically suicidal move of denying climate change.

there is a part of me that wants to support ms. smith. i like newcomers. i like mavericks. i like people who are trying to shake things up. the thing is, her talking points on the carbon issue show how totally out of touch she is. do we want another out of touch government? um. no.

so does anyone have anything to say in her defense?

2/5/10

wowzer browzer

in an effort to economize, i decided to get eyebrow shapings less frequently. a month and a half went by; they didn't look that bad. and then two and they were a bit spindly but passable. and then i forgot about it....

until the other day when i looked at myself in the mirror and, to my horror, realized that the two caterpillars had taken over my face. cripes. see for yourself:
so i made an appointment with a brow artist in slc. this brow artist woman works on all the "famous" people in utah according to her website (i am trying to think of who those people might be. carlos boozer doesn't really strike me as a metro sexual kind of guy. neither does president monson, maybe robert redford is her client?). anyway take a gander at her handiwork.
i feel like a woman again.

i am not going to say what brow artist charged, but i will say it is highway robbery. needless to say, i didn't save a cent....which means that walking around looking like i had two giant cocoons on my face for two months was totally pointless.

i hate when i try to be thrifty and it backfires.