2. buy a large tub of red vines at costco. hoard them.
3. dye your hair* ** ***.
* don't worry mom it is a temp--i'll be back to blond in no time. it was either this or cut it all off.
** since red fades from washing, i plan on not stepping foot in a shower for about 5 weeks.
*** yes, i agree. i look like a russian mail order bride.