if you join the chocolate society of salt lake city, then your chocolate consumption will go through the roof. if your chocolate consumption goes through the roof, then you will gain weight. if you gain weight, then you will not fit into your clothes. if you do not fit into your clothes, then you will have a mental breakdown every single morning when you get dressed.
so
if you join the chocolate society, then you will have a mental breakdown every morning when you get dressed.
i joined the chocolate society of salt lake city....
take a stab at how my mornings have been lately.
2/6/11
2/1/11
back to the blob*
a couple of weeks ago i was in a meeting with some people. during a lull in the conversation, one of the attendee's turned to me and said:
"i read your blog. you are kind of off the wall."
the way it was said, i couldn't tell if being "off the wall" was intended as a compliment. i wasn't really getting the vibe that is was.....inside i cringed. i was embarrassed. i felt like a bloomin' idiot. so on the drive home i was thinking about all the ways to avoid feeling these kinds of things....
the truth is the person who said i was "off the wall" has NO IDEA how nutty i really am. my blog is a pretty pithy representation of what i think and feel. i've got oodles of unpublished posts. posts i decided not to put up because i thought they might make me look stupid or crazy or hurt people's feelings. i haven't been brave enough to open myself up that much and i haven't wanted to be judged based on something i wrote on my blog. the truth is judgment is unavoidable. and in my case,in trying to protect myself from judgment, i've lost my voice. straight up lame.
for me, the solution isn't going private. only expressing things in safe space won't help me learn to better articulate my ideas. it won't help me find the courage i need to say hard things when they need to be said. it won't help me learn to be a more diplomatic writer.
so this year....my blog is going to be me. real mercedes. all of me...most of me...more of me than you have seen in the past (this being open stuff is kind of scary--and the oprah expose on blog security doesn't exactly help) so if you read something and you think...."man that mercedes is kinda nuts"...yes i kinda am.
*on one of the blogs i read the author calls her blog her BLOB. i just love that and imitation is flattery and all that stuff.
"i read your blog. you are kind of off the wall."
the way it was said, i couldn't tell if being "off the wall" was intended as a compliment. i wasn't really getting the vibe that is was.....inside i cringed. i was embarrassed. i felt like a bloomin' idiot. so on the drive home i was thinking about all the ways to avoid feeling these kinds of things....
the truth is the person who said i was "off the wall" has NO IDEA how nutty i really am. my blog is a pretty pithy representation of what i think and feel. i've got oodles of unpublished posts. posts i decided not to put up because i thought they might make me look stupid or crazy or hurt people's feelings. i haven't been brave enough to open myself up that much and i haven't wanted to be judged based on something i wrote on my blog. the truth is judgment is unavoidable. and in my case,in trying to protect myself from judgment, i've lost my voice. straight up lame.
for me, the solution isn't going private. only expressing things in safe space won't help me learn to better articulate my ideas. it won't help me find the courage i need to say hard things when they need to be said. it won't help me learn to be a more diplomatic writer.
so this year....my blog is going to be me. real mercedes. all of me...most of me...more of me than you have seen in the past (this being open stuff is kind of scary--and the oprah expose on blog security doesn't exactly help) so if you read something and you think...."man that mercedes is kinda nuts"...yes i kinda am.
*on one of the blogs i read the author calls her blog her BLOB. i just love that and imitation is flattery and all that stuff.
12/16/10
me and my best friend joni
old joni mitchell and i have a lot in common. check it out:
both blonds
both alberta girls
both moved to america
both don't know what we got til it's gone (sorry about that grammar situation mom).
so basically we are kindred spirits or something. anyway ever since i got home from edmonton my mind has been playing joni's big yellow taxi on repeat.
here is why:
i hated garlic city for the 4+ years i lived there. now in most cases hate is a strong word....here it probably doesn't even start to do my feelings justice. i'd go back to calgary pretty much every chance i got. i was always looking into transferring "someplace cool" and when i realized that was too much trouble, i started hitting the books like a mad dog just to make sure that one day i'd at least have the option of going "someplace cool."
and i did (and it was fun). and i haven't really looked back.
until a few weeks ago when i found myself in good ol' garlic city once again. i am driving around old strathcona with sister rax and i start getting all teary eyed and wistful. seeing my old stomping grounds: the buildings i studied in, the restaurants i ate at, the neighborhoods i walked through....just made me so nostalgic. university times were some pretty good times.
then we went to a wedding and saw many old friends. i may not always have liked edmonton, but by george, there were some amazing people there. i look at these people now, many who still live in edmonton, and just feel so lucky to have had the chance to associate with them. and i feel like a nard dog because i didn't appreciate then how rare people like that are.
and now i am half-wishing to move back to edmonton, and buy a house in glenora, and get together with friends and play settlers of catan every weekend, become oilers fans, go for winter dream hikes through the river valley, and eat a lot of perogies....
because this time i would appreciate every little moment of it.
seriously.
even when it is -45.
post notes:
1. so i may have had this conversion re: garlic city, but don't expect it to happen re: SL,UT.
2. gold stars to fellow former golden bears who say they miss garlic city. i want odes to edmonton!
3. oh and recently my friend chucky (one of those people i was talking about above) started calling edmonton "garlic city." i loved it so much i decided to do my part to make sure the nickname sticks. so now do your part!
both blonds
both alberta girls
both moved to america
both don't know what we got til it's gone (sorry about that grammar situation mom).
so basically we are kindred spirits or something. anyway ever since i got home from edmonton my mind has been playing joni's big yellow taxi on repeat.
here is why:
i hated garlic city for the 4+ years i lived there. now in most cases hate is a strong word....here it probably doesn't even start to do my feelings justice. i'd go back to calgary pretty much every chance i got. i was always looking into transferring "someplace cool" and when i realized that was too much trouble, i started hitting the books like a mad dog just to make sure that one day i'd at least have the option of going "someplace cool."
and i did (and it was fun). and i haven't really looked back.
until a few weeks ago when i found myself in good ol' garlic city once again. i am driving around old strathcona with sister rax and i start getting all teary eyed and wistful. seeing my old stomping grounds: the buildings i studied in, the restaurants i ate at, the neighborhoods i walked through....just made me so nostalgic. university times were some pretty good times.
then we went to a wedding and saw many old friends. i may not always have liked edmonton, but by george, there were some amazing people there. i look at these people now, many who still live in edmonton, and just feel so lucky to have had the chance to associate with them. and i feel like a nard dog because i didn't appreciate then how rare people like that are.
and now i am half-wishing to move back to edmonton, and buy a house in glenora, and get together with friends and play settlers of catan every weekend, become oilers fans, go for winter dream hikes through the river valley, and eat a lot of perogies....
because this time i would appreciate every little moment of it.
seriously.
even when it is -45.
post notes:
1. so i may have had this conversion re: garlic city, but don't expect it to happen re: SL,UT.
2. gold stars to fellow former golden bears who say they miss garlic city. i want odes to edmonton!
3. oh and recently my friend chucky (one of those people i was talking about above) started calling edmonton "garlic city." i loved it so much i decided to do my part to make sure the nickname sticks. so now do your part!
12/14/10
goo gets married
it was one heck of a weekend in garlic city. watching dearest lindsay marry spencer was such a great way to kickoff the holiday season. she was radiant. it was a joyous celebration and i feel honoured to have been included.
momma, rax and i practiced our modeling poses in the photo booth, made random kids rock out with us on the dance floor, and overate (shocker). total blast.
momma, rax and i practiced our modeling poses in the photo booth, made random kids rock out with us on the dance floor, and overate (shocker). total blast.
10/31/10
When I Rock the Mic
I ROCK THE MIC RIGHT!!!!
1. thank you to robbie williams for inspiring me to get down with my bad self.
2. thank you to utah county for inspiring this totally "ama-zing" outfit.
10/27/10
9/14/10
Big Eater
son look at all the people in this restaurant,
what do you think they weigh?
and out to the window to the parking lot
at their SUV's taking all the space...
~Ben Folds
what do you think they weigh?
and out to the window to the parking lot
at their SUV's taking all the space...
~Ben Folds
am i the only one out there who's noticed that like 80% of cheesecake factory patrons are two bites and a gulp away from a massive heart attack? these people are HUGE and i'm not talking like they've got cushion for the pushin'. i'm talking the kind of people who need to use the motorized scooters over at walmart because they can't WALK. they say obesity in america is an epidemic. a meal at cheesecake factory should clue us all in to the reason.
THE PORTIONS ARE HUGE.
now before you all go and accuse me of being one of those chicks who eats like a bird, lemme just say that i am a champion eater. i sometimes wish i was one of those girls who looked at a big plate of steaming pasta and said, "this is way to much! i could never possibly eat all of this."
these girls seem dainty and feminine--but i'm more the type to offer people help with their leftovers. this is why on a recent trip to CF i was able to work my way through the bread basket and this:
and this:
and still have room for this:
and this:
and still have room for this:
the thing is that just because you can, doesn't mean you should. i can eat a lot--but it isn't really good for me. not only because sooner or later my metabolism is going to crash and burn, but because eating a lot of food in one sitting doesn't seem to agree with my digestive system, a fact i had the pleasure of considering in depth while confined to the washroom the day after my visit to CF.
the thing is, i have this (kinda trashy) mentality where i think a place is good if they serve A LOT of food. i went to a restaurant in calgary recently where three ounces of steak took you to the tune of thirty bones. i was royally ticked off because i thought they were cheating me (never mind that it was of finest quality, practically melted in my mouth, and my dad was paying). when my mother reminded me that the canadian food guide suggests that adults only consume three ounces meat (or protein) at any given meal, i shut up and ate my meat (and pigged on the family style sides).
(that is not enough! who the heck seriously get's full on a deck of cards?)
(that is not enough! who the heck seriously get's full on a deck of cards?)but i am still kind of mad about it, because for some reason i get annoyed when a restaurant imposes portion control on me. on the other hand i get grossed out by places like CF which are pretty much shrines to gluttony. so what's a big eater whose worried about her weight to do? if i don't want to end up on one of those motorized scooters, i'd better get on the portion control bandwagon pronto....but i still wanna get my money's worth!!!
so here is the question, do you prefer going to a restaurant like cheesecake factory where you have to be the portion control police, or do you like it when a restaurant does it for you? when you dine at a shrine of gluttony what strategies do you use to control you food intake?
give me the straight. the skinny. the skinny straight.
mucho gracias.
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