Feeling Crusty

we've all read those "cute" letters to things like feet and waistlines on the shi shi blogs. i am not knocking them. i actually love them and the bloggers who write them, people like her and her....

i thought about writing some letters too.....except every time i sit down to write a letter i come out sounding more like hunter s. thompson in the fear and loathing letters than the nice, sweet, thoughtful blogger i aspire to be...

but the truth is that lately i've been feeling a little crusty. if catharsis works will getting my grievances off my chest make me feel better? here goes nothing.

dear michael: i have no idea what you put in that hamburger meat but now our house smells like a third world country. this is to put you on notice: you no longer have unsupervised seasoning privileges. also i am really glad right now that you insisted we buy febreeze in bulk.

dear utah: it isn't you, it's me. i can't handle your dry climate, or your funky culture, or how your people name their children things like Alivyiah, Tridger or Kaegrin. i'm sure you have some redeeming qualities, i'd just prefer not to be the one who has to look for them. (it is you).

dear jason chaffetz: i know you are trying to make a name for yourself in washington, but taking a page out of hilter's political play book isn't the way to win friends and influence people.

dear humidity: enough is enough. 4/4 mornings this week i've woken up soaking wet. i feel gross (and trust me it is your fault. it has nothing to do with the inordinate amount of fried food i've eaten this week...nothing at all).

dear really bad waiter at cambridge common: we have eaten at cambridge common twice in the last 7 days. both times you screwed orders up. you seem like a nice kid, but if you seriously don't know the difference between chicken fingers and chicken wings it might be time to consider a new line of work.

xo mercedes

i need to know i'm not the only one out there who feels crusty sometimes. leave your grievences in my comments....and i sort of feel better. thanks for asking.